AITA for telling my sister she was out of her mind when she said she wanted to take back my child whom I adopted from her?
My (36) sister N (29) got pregnant at 18. I am infertile and knew I couldn't have kids so when N said she was giving her baby for adoption, I decided to be her mom. N went no contact 5 months after giving birth. For a bit of background, N got pregnant by a one night stand and she apparently didn't remember or know the father at the time of birth but when V was 2, a man T (35) messaged me on social media claiming to be the father of my child. N had run into him at a club and drunkenly confessed to the pregnancy. We met up, he bonded with his daughter and well that man is now my husband of 7 years. Coming back to my sister, she called me yesterday. Although I was surprised at her call, I picked up. We made some small talk, then she said she had just gotten married a year back and both of them wanted children but couldn't because her husband was infertile but really wanted kids. I asked her if she wanted to adopt and she said she would just need to get her baby back. I was speechless for a few moments before replying that if she wants to meet my child as an aunt she is welcome to and we both can sit V down and explain the reason for her absence but she can't just ask me to give up my child. She said she'll sue me as she's the birth mother. I told her she was out of her mind and I told her about T. She exploded. Calling me names and saying I stole her life. I got too emotional and hung up. T came home from work and on explaining to him, he was beyond furious. I then got a call from my parents saying I was an asshole for telling N she couldn't she her baby. I said I never said that and I welcomed her to bond with V but they refused to listen and said I was being insensitive and harsh and flaunting my family.
I now feel bad because me and N were very close as sisters and I feel quite close to her situation since I know the struggles of infertility. T said there was no way he was letting my sister have full time and I agree but I want to know if am the asshole for being too harsh and telling her about T.
Edit - I did legally adopt V at birth. T adopted her too after we got married. N never wanted kids and I feel the only reason she wants V now is because her husband wants kids. I don't know but I think this is it and T agrees.
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