TIFU by accidentally picking up a prostitute.
I decided to take an impromptu trip to Las Vegas, booked the hotel last minute, and showed up around 12 AM. Just wanted something to do for the weekend instead of just sitting around doing nothing all day.
After drinking I decided to pull some money out of the ATM and go looking for a roulette table. I’m not one to gamble much so I only took out a couple hundred and only found tables with $50 minimums. Not wanting to lose my money in 5 minutes I thought, why not go looking for a different table?
I took a walk and while passing some slot machines I saw some girl looking at me smiling. I looked away and then turned back and she was still looking at me. She waved and called me over and we starting talking. She basically gave some story about her mom in bad health and she was just looking to go out and drink and have “fun”. She then leaned forward and grabbed my groin in the middle of the casino floor.
After missing several red flags, I thought to myself, “I haven’t been laid for a minute, fuck it, I’ll have a one night stand if she’s just dtf.” So off we go to my room.
We get to the room and I say, “so you’re not just looking for a place to stay for the night right?” And she says, “No, I live here, I’m just looking to have fun. I thought you said you’ve been to Vegas before?” I tell her yes but maybe not the real Vegas.
After a short pause and a confused look she says, “Uh, I’m working…” after another short pause she says, “Sorry, I thought you knew.”
I was surprised, but more so with the fact that I was that oblivious. I’ve been in a weird situation before where two girls at a bar decided to dance with me and pick me up so I just thought this was just going to be some crazy out of the blue hookup.
She tells me that she’ll at least need 10 dollars since I basically just cost her money. Awesome thing about taking out hundreds in Vegas is now I only have hundred dollar bills. I wanted to make a joke about asking for change, but I just gave her a hundred and said, “sorry for wasting your time”. All I could think of was a joke about possibly paying for an STD instead of just having a one night stand and it being free.
My friends asked me at that point why I didn’t just go through with it. I gave it a thought, but paying for it would not have been worth it.
I laid in bed for an hour after that. After not being able to sleep, with my last hundred I took it to roulette and lost in 5 minutes. I then drove home at 4 AM.
TL;DR: I picked up a girl thinking I was just going to have a one night stand, but she was a prostitute.
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