AITA flipping out on my fiance for cancelling all the vegan food options from our wedding food menu behind my back? (Final Update)
Original BORU: Link
[Link to Post:(https://www.reddit.com/user/SarahJake2022/comments/wlu21m/update_aita_for_flipping_out_on_my_fiance_for/) Mood Spoiler: OP is single
(didn't realize how long the title was lol).
So, the talk didn't go well. I waited for him to come home so we could have a final conversation about it "but" he still insisted on his stance.
for more details, his family are a bit on the heavy side. Nothing wrong with that, they're perfectly within their right to decide how to live but they get "easily offended" at the mention of the words "weight" & "food".
I tried so hard to focus on the issue at hand, but I noticed there was a pattern of this behavior. he said it wasn't true, and that this was just an attempt for me to throw past conflicts at him in order to win the current one. he claimed he tried to reason with me about why and how his guests might see those vegan options as "offensive", also said that his family love food and consider it a "big deal", and how he didn't want his family to feel like there's certain options that they "couldn't touch" and feel that there's "difference in how I treat them vs how I treat my family"..... he then went on to explain how it's just an event and how my family should just accept what's on the menu and if they felt "inconvinience" so what? it's just a one time thing, they're not gonna die if they "had salad and appetizers". What he said wasn't good enough reason for me cause his folks are gonna think & say what they want, but at the end of the day it's my wedding!!!. and to be honest, realizing that my partner himself thinks it's okay to steamroll my opinions and decisions simply because..he's prioritizing others and their opinions over me was really upsetting and not something that could be looked past.
normally, I'm a person of rational discussions and compromises...I'm ALL about compromises, I'd compromised on much bigger matters than just food but like people said....it's not about the food anymore (if it ever was!!)like...he'd literally lose nothing if he let me have what I wanted but apparently, he was willing to lose it all over this which's fine by me.
I gave him back the ring and called everything off. I just couldn't envision myself living like this any longer..having to walk on eggshells for his family and letting him basically override my opinions and have the final say nomatter what. marriage is about compromise and here he has nothing to lose yet chose to do this to me and my family. mind you this is my first serious relationship and I didn't know what to expect, but it's safe to say that he and his mom and FAMILY did make it feel like I was taking crazy pills on many many ocassions so that's that. Last thing he said was that I chose my family over him and ended everything between for the sake of "keeping 'em happy". Decision's been made and it's done.
Just wanted to give an update to those who wanted it. thank you so much for your endless stream of advice and support.
Note from OP: hey, someone gave me a silver. While appreciated, if anyone wants to give awards can you follow the links to OOP and award her instead? All I did was copy and paste.
[link] [comments]
from reddit: the front page of the internet https://ift.tt/3z652wB
Leave Comments
Post a Comment