AITAH for saying we can’t come to the Christmas eve party unless we can use the guest bedroom?

Every year my mom hosts a family Christmas eve party. It is one of the most important events of the year to her and she’s let me know if I don’t show up it will impact the relationship. The problem is the sleeping situation is too difficult for my wife.

For the last 5 years my wife and I have slept in the basement when we come visit. My wife has some medical issues that make it so she has to use the restroom frequently, as well as being allergic to animals (litter boxes and beds are in the basement). The only way to the bathroom from the basement is through my parent’s room and that wakes them up so they’ve asked her to try to stop going as frequently. This sometimes caused her to get no sleep when we visited.

Last year my brother moved out so my parents converted his bedroom to a guest bedroom. My wife asked if for future Christmases if we could stay here so she can get some real rest. It’s a lot of travel to see both families on Christmas. The problem is, my mom thinks it’s unfair for one couple to claim the guest room for any specific holiday. As well as my brother says it is not his problem that we chose to live so far away and we have the same option to drive home as he does. He is about 10 mins from the house we are 2 hours. Unfortunately my wife does not feel it is safe for us to try to drive 2 hours home at midnight on Christmas eve and then try to wake up early for Christmas with her family.

She was willing to suck it up for years when it was the only option but now that there is a guest room she feels she shouldn’t have to sacrifice her health. I can see both my mom’s and my wife’s side here.

AITAH for telling my mom we will only come to the party if we get the guest bedroom?

submitted by /u/ThrowRA-Main-8561 to r/AITAH
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